so i am at work and i am behind the counter by myself for a short while - which is so strange - to be alone and at work - to be responsible for whatever happens - i also keep thinking of how quickly life has changed for me - four months ago i was in front of a classroom - now i am behind a counter - it seems like a whole other lifetime ago - like i am not that person anymore somehow -

customer time….gtg

so i am - for the millionth time in my life - going down on coffee - to which my dear friend julia decided was some kind of coffee pornography in the making - which i can verify the untruth of here and now - me and coffee broke up years ago - this is just the caffeine thing - i swear

at any rate - i sit here in front of my computer - stressed out and messy over life things - like taxes bills and that sort of thing - and i am not looking at my delicious creamy fresh cup of coffee - nope - i look now at tea - plain old tea - and i look at this tea longingly to wake me up and to provide me with the comfort and stability that coffee provides - but also - to regulate my jitters - to not stress me out or fuck with my brain - i wonder if its capable - i wonder if coffee will notice i have not indulged this morning - i wonder if coffee is mad

my name is diana and i have a coffee problem -

i would rather do these things than go to work

1 - read kurt vonnegut all day

2 - read blogs

3 - paint my nails

4 - sew new clothes for myself -

5 - watch bad 80’s movies with people named cory in them

6 - take a bubble bath

7 - make homemade pizza

8 - listen to LOUD music and dance

9 - paint things

10 - make mix cd’s for all my friends

but instead i am going to work